refills, refills

I type with trepidation today. I opened the bottle of anti-depressants, only to discover that I needed a refill. So They'll be taken in the afternoon today. Now, for anyone bothering to study pharmacology, anti depressants are not like tylenol or benadryl...they build up, so a few hours will not derail me. That is scientific fact. Still I hate when I do that. It is so important to me for so many reasons that I take this medicine exactly as outlined....to the letter.

There is a little part of me that has been holding up a wall for awhile, and I find myself letting it fall little by little. Now, I won't let it crash to the ground until the time is right. But there will come a time when I will proverbially release the hounds, and I am sure I will find it quite satisfying. I don't expect the hounds to make any type of impression, but releasing them is something that must be done. What is it they say? The truth shall set you free. My friends hate it when I write this way, vague and cryptic. But alas, it must be for a little while longer. How much truth I proclaim will be entirely dependent on what my life looks like when it is time to proclaim it. For those who may find themselves engaged in hand-wringing, do not worry. I am my mother's daughter. I know the meanings of tact and grace, and I will always be a Southern lady regardless of where I live. But it is 2010, and I will not hide.

So now that all of that follery is out of the way, I must say I am happy that the weather is warm, the flowers and blooming, and the calendar is progessing nicely. I think it's my turn to dream.